Conversations with Omen IV

You’ve said that there’s life all over the universe, right? So, here on earth there’s like seven billion people, and if there’s even more people out there, then there must be tens of billions of souls.

“Yes Thomas, there are more souls than I can give an accounting of. In your terms it would be a vast number that would be hard for you to easily accept.”

Okay, well that made me wonder about something; if there’s that many souls out there, how do you keep in contact with them? I mean, I know you personally don’t have to talk to them all, but I’m guessing that what you call the Pure Love must know them all.

“You are correct about my not needing to be in contact with all souls, but I do have responsibility for more than you might guess. The answer to your question is a complicated one, but I will attempt to do so with an analogy based on my role here. The souls that I watch over are in many places at any given point in time. If you think of communication in earthly terms then it would seem impossible to be in touch with all of them. But, that is not how it works here.

“In terms you can understand, it is comparable to your thinking of someone you know and having them appear before you instantly. If I were to need to speak with Seth about something, I think of him and I am there with him. The part I believe you may have a hard time understanding is that he remains where he is, as do I.”

So, it’s like telepathy? A psychic connection to the other person?

“It is so much more than that Thomas. We truly are together for the time we are communicating, but we are separate as well. For souls that are living a life that is not on earth, we can do the same thing as they go about their physical lives. It’s only the earthbound that we do not have this ability with – hence you and I meeting here as you sleep.”

Wow, so, on other planets they can hear you in their minds at any time?

“That is an approximation of the concept, and it will do for our conversations sake.”

That makes earth sound like we’re the beginner’s planet. Like we’re not advanced enough to be able to do things that are common in other places.

“There is no value judgement inherent in the abilities of the earthbound, Thomas. All souls are learning and growing, and each place that they take on a life has different challenges and accomplishments. There are souls that have begun their journey on other worlds, and then chosen a life on earth – they have no advantage over one that began their journey on earth. In my opinion, they may be at a small disadvantage when compared to the earth-originated soul. Humanity is a very complicated system of life Thomas, and it is full of extremes. Many other places are nothing like it; in fact no other place I have ever been is like it.”

I guess it’s good to know we’re not the kindergarten of the universe. But, what makes life here so unique, so different than elsewhere?

“That is an excellent question Thomas, and difficult to answer with any specificity. I would have to say that the word ‘depth’ might be a starting point for us. Humans have a depth of many characteristics that are not found in other beings. Your emotions combined with the physical sensations or reactions to them, are very unique. Many souls choose to live many lives on earth to explore the vastness of those feelings. In turn, souls new to an earthly life are often recognized by their self-limiting of their emotions and reactions.”

“You must understand something important here, humanity is one of the few types of beings in the universe that has such emotions, and places such a high importance on them as well. The greater numbers of social beings do not require or place high importance on having an emotional connection before mating, or creating a family unit. These are not primitive or somehow backwards societies I am speaking of, but highly intelligent beings of ancient descent. When souls from those planets decide to choose a life in earth, they are often quite socially awkward and unpracticed at forming relationships.”

I think everyone I’ve ever dated was from another planet after hearing that.

“That seems statistically impossible Thomas.”

It was a joke Omen, just a joke. Don’t they have jokes or humor where you’re at?

“Thomas, there are certain souls that are filled with humor and laughter. I do not mean to give an image of a person who constantly makes jokes, but rather a soul that is just bright with joy and laughter. Your soul is like that Thomas, and I can see and hear it coming through even now.”

Great, well a lot of good it’s done me so far.

“Cynicism covers up pain Thomas, have you experienced pain from your humor?”

I’m not sure I’d say pain, but it hasn’t always been an asset for me. Well, let me rephrase that; it’s an asset to me personally because my own humor keeps my internal spirits up. It’s also been good when I’m with my friends, or meeting new people. On the other hand, it’s sometimes been a detriment in professional situations. A lot of people in the business world don’t think that a guy who’s funny is a serious person – nor can they be. It’s a weird prejudice that I’ve run into a few times in my life. I’d see upper management pick some other guy for a big project – one who was less experienced than me. When I asked around to see why, I heard that they didn’t think ‘the funny guy’ would be a good project manager.

“I believe you are correct Thomas when you said it is a prejudice you experienced. There is no true logic behind that belief, no data to support it – the very definition of a prejudice. The people who own or run businesses would be better positioned for success if they realized that a person with a humorous and joyful soul makes the work environment a better experience for those around them.”

It’s good to hear you say that Omen, it’s something I’ve thought myself for a long time. But I can’t say that very many others subscribe to my point of view.

Thomas, do you remember when you tried Lysergic acid for the first time? Your mind was filled with old stories you had heard about people having ‘bad trips’ as you called it. You told me you were worried that you might discover that you had a ‘dark side’ that you had been repressing. Yet the night you finally tried it, you found that you had a completely positive experience. You laughed and played for hours and hours before it wore off. I think you discovered that you actually have a joyful soul that radiates humor and warmth.”

In all honesty I’ve felt that way sometimes too, I just never thought about it very deeply. I love to have fun, and I love making people laugh, or smile at least. I don’t do it to be the center of attention, or for some deep seated need to be liked by everyone. I just have my own kind of fun I guess. I’ve just never understood why some people seem like it’s the worst quality a person can have.

“Thomas, you are savvy enough to know that people with inner pain and trauma are not the ones who are looking to laugh. For many souls such as that, what they actually seek is ‘sameness’ from others who also harbor inner pain. You represent the opposite of those people, you are free of inner trauma and able to laugh whenever you choose to. That is a choice some souls do not feel that they have.”

Conversations with Omen III

Can I ask you an odd question? I mean, it’s kind of silly, but it’s something I’ve thought about on and off over the years…

“Certainly Thomas, although you already know I cannot reveal the future to you, or allow you to know what another human’s private thoughts are.”

Yeah, um, it’s not about any of those things. You’re going to laugh actually, it’s so dumb, but I still can’t help wondering about it – especially after meeting and getting to know you.

“You do seem unusually uncomfortable Thomas, and there is no need to be so.”

Alright, yeah, you’re right I guess. Well, um, here it goes… Since you guys can pop in and out of our lives, and you can watch us and we don’t’ even know it… I mean, can you even see us when we’re being, um, intimate with ourselves, or if we’re just trying something new and personal?

“You are generally referring to when you are masturbating I assume?”

Well, yeah that’s pretty much it. I mean, I just figure that you must see about everything we do here, and I don’t mean me per se, but there’s probably a lot of folks who do some pretty odd stuff. Stuff I’m sure that goes on all over the world, not just here…

“This is actually a very fine question Thomas. I do hope your embarrassment will subside as I answer it. There really is no reason for such discomfort. The short answer is yes, we do see our earthbound souls engaged in a wide variety of activities that they almost certainly would not wish to be observed doing. You need to keep in mind that guides, such as myself, have all had earthly lives, sometimes many of them. Furthermore, we have all experienced every single urge, curiosity and drive that you and others have. We have all done the exact things that many of you do now, and we understand the deeper physical nature of it.”

Okay, but what about people that knew us? Like family members who’ve passed away already, will they see us doing things too? I just have this horrible image in my mind of my mother seeing me…

“I am not quite sure how to completely assuage your fears Thomas, other than to tell you that your mother’s soul is not a guide, and that even if it were, there would still be no judgement made. You are applying uniquely human qualities to us, and they do not fit here. You are seeing the situations you describe through human mores, and your own social stigmas. When we come to visit an earthbound soul, we are seeing you through the eyes of love and understanding. We have a completely different perspective than you do Thomas, no matter what may be going on in your life.”

Okay, I am being intentionally extreme for a minute, but it’ll help me understand this better; what if you pop in and I’m doing something really weird, like with an animal or a doll?

“Thomas… You do not need to create extreme examples for me to consider. My answer will remain unchanged in each case. We understand more than you do, we see a larger picture than you can. There are layer upon layer of complicated lives and timelines that weave together in incomprehensible complex patterns – yet all are on a unique path to some greater understanding. You may not know it, they may not know it, but it is all intertwined in a fabric that Pure Love has created for us all.”

Pure Love? I didn’t know that love can create things, well, other than more love, or some happiness. I also don’t understand how love could create people who do really sick or dangerous stuff their whole lives. What the hell does that have to do with Pure Love?

“I may have gotten ahead of myself when I said that. It requires more understanding of certain aspects than you are familiar with. The Pure Love is what created all things at the beginning. It has many names, but for my purposes I use Pure Love as the name for it. All souls are made from it, and in a sense are a small piece of it as well. Each soul is on a path of learning and understanding unique to itself, and often that path is unknown to nearly all observers.”

Look Omen, I like the way this sounds, but it’s super hard for me to see how some guy like Hitler was on any kind of path of learning or understanding anything. There are people on earth who are just completely evil and twisted inside, and I just can’t see how they can be learning anything but how to be more evil.

“Once again Thomas, the concept of ‘evil’ is a human paradigm that does not truly exist beyond earth. I do agree that there are lives that do not appear to do anything more that cause harm, mayhem and grief for others. They may cause the deaths of many others, or a specific few – yet in each case they cause immense grief and suffering in many others. From your perspective you can only see the harmful consequences of their actions, the wakes of misery and destruction they leave. From our perspective we see so much more, and I am afraid there is much I cannot explain at this time. Suffice it to say that each and every person that has been, or will be touched by a tragedy, is on a path of learning that you cannot see. You have an expression about hard times making people stronger; that’s something to keep in mind when you think about situations such as you described.”

So, evil people may be here to start the ball rolling for other people’s learning? Like they’re some kind of catalysts?

“That is one way of looking at it, and it may be the best understanding of it that you will achieve at this time. Just remember one thing; each soul on earth has chosen to be there. They know, before they depart to earth, what the outline of their life will be like. They do not see each day of their future like it was a scripted movie, but they do know of the most impacting events that will come to them, and they chose to go and live that life. They sometimes choose to do so for their own growth, and sometimes only for the benefit of others. It is actually an unbelievably beautiful moment when a soul is about to embark on an altruistic life that is set to benefit only others.”

Wait a minute, so you’re saying that a kid that is going to die at a young age, like in a car crash, or from cancer… they already know it ahead of time? I mean, before they’re even born here?

“Yes, they are aware of the largest events that will occur in their earthbound lives. They choose to live that particular life for both the known and unknown benefits. I know it is hard to understand from your perspective, and I further speculate that you are questioning why the Pure Love allows this. My only answer goes back to the very complex tapestry of the existence of everything. I can assure you that it made perfect sense to you when you were a soul, and it will again someday too.”

Is everything predestined then? All of our futures are just various lessons to be checked-off in some cosmic book?

“No, that is not an accurate analogy. Humans have so much free will; millions of decisions face them every year of their lives. Those decisions shape their journey in myriad ways, yet they do not preclude the largest events. There are some milestones that cannot be avoided. Yet, your lives are like a maze in certain aspects; the entrance, a few turns, and the ‘exit’ are certainties, but the rest is free-form and plastic.”

This is a lot to take in and absorb, but the way you and I met, that was part of the ‘free-form’, right?

“Yes, your encounter with me and the two others, at the way-station, was indeed an unexpected event. I must be honest with you and say that I still am unsure how it was possible. It has not ever happened before, and never since then either. I have asked my own guide, but I was given no direct answer. There are small mysteries to yet be revealed, even on my side.”

What about those ‘exits’ anyway, I mean does it really matter how someone dies here? My own mother used to tell me that people who committed suicide wouldn’t go to heaven. Now, before you start in on me, I know that ‘heaven’ isn’t a true description of the afterlife you’ve told me about, but I’m using it in context and conversationally.

“You do amuse me Thomas, thank you for that, I truly mean it. In answer to the question, no, it does not matter how an earthbound soul’s life ends, either accidentally, naturally, nefariously or at their own hands, all souls come home to the same place. Legends and lore are usually based in the morals of the society they originated in, to teach something to the people. Such as, suicide is wrong, or usually a poor choice made during an unstable state of mind. They also cause a great deal of emotional suffering amongst those left behind by the departing soul. Therefore societies have created moral and legal proclamations against not only suicide, but murder, assisted suicide, and euthanasia. In the afterlife all souls are welcomed home by those familiar and loved.”

Conversations with Omen II

“You sound very upset by this interaction you had.”

Yeah, well the guy just butts-in with his ‘If I’d have been there here’s what I would have done…’ and it was so condescending and kind of embarrassing too. It’s so easy to be the after-the-fact guy and announce how you would have handled some situation. He wasn’t the one called in by the executives to give them an overview, and he wasn’t the one who had to answer all of their questions either.

“Did it make you feel like you had failed in some way?”

No, not really… I did a pretty complete presentation of our issues, and I’m sure that the management understood everything I outlined. They followed up with some pretty tough questions that Stan ended up hearing about, and that’s when he started preaching about how differently he would have handled it. Of course it was all presented to me as if he was trying to help me out with his vast experience. He just burns me up sometimes.

“Perhaps you are not seeing this interaction for what it truly was. There are many facets to each gem, and this encounter is no different. You are upset because of the perspective you have chosen to view this from, not allowing yourself to imagine that there are other possibilities.”

Like what? I can’t just think that Stan is an asshat and I don’t have to listen to asshats?

“That is not at all what I am attempting to relay to you. In this case, as in many other cases, the person offering the ‘advice’ is doing more than just trying to best you at some game. The person is usually inflating their own ego, so to speak. It is all ego-based braggadocio disguised as some kind of help to you. Does he think you will encounter the exact same situation in the near-future? No, he is putting on an ego-show for you and anyone else listening. It is what someone once called ‘mental masturbation’ in a public place.”

So he’s just performing for the crowd huh? I can see that now, I knew he wasn’t really helping me at all. It’s not like I don’t know the difference, I’ve had people give me constructive criticism before, and it feels completely different.

“Yes, of course it does because ‘help’ meant to aid you. Good critique is offered in private, as to not risk embarrassing the one you are intending to help. It usually consists of some points of critique followed closely by advice that can make a difference in the future. Also, it is effective to point out what the person has done correctly as well, and emphasize their strengths for support. Criticism is best received with a bit of sweetener to make it digestible. If the receiver feels attacked, their defenses naturally come in to play and nothing is accomplished.”

So it’s possible to help someone out after something like my presentation, without making them feel like you’re saying that you’d have done it all better?

“Very much so. When the ego is put aside, and your heart tells you that you truly are trying to assist someone, the entire experience feels different to both parties. The receiver of the offered knowledge can also tell that it is being offered from a genuine place. In this case, your associate was only trying to reassure himself, and others, that he might have done a better job if it. My guess is that no one, not even himself, truly believed any part of what he said to you. People such as that are very transparent to those who understand the true nature of helping a colleague.”

If I look at it how you laid it out I can see that Stan is just as insecure as anyone else might be. Seeing it that way, it’s hard to be mad at him – I kind of want to assure him that when it’s his turn to do a presentation, he’ll be fine.

“That is a fine thought for you to have. Perspective and knowledge can give you a different place from which to view others from. Once you can understand their motives and objectives, it makes it easier to check your own ego, and respond in a more measured way.”

So, it’s almost like getting a peek at what another’s soul journey is about, in a way. The things that people do or say can reveal the parts of themselves that they are either working on, or need to be.

“That is a very difficult statement for me to simply agree with, Thomas. Perhaps it is best to concentrate on your own journey, and not attempt to decipher another’s. In that way you can remain on your own path and not be side tracked by what another soul may or may not need be doing.”

Ahh, so if I’m trying to figure out what someone else needs to work on, I’m just distracting myself from my own learning?

“Yes, something like that, but there is a bit more to it. I will tell you that there are some earthbound souls who are extremely good at figuring out what you are here for, but that knowledge is seldom used for positive interaction. It is true that some of those individuals can become teachers or gurus of some manner, but more often the knowledge is used in ways that diminish others.”

You mean like con-men or other grifter type criminals? They figure out your vulnerabilities and then pretend to supply you with whatever you most need?

“That example will suffice, but just know that there are myriad ways the same knowledge can be used for corruption. I do not mean to imply that there always like that, in fact there are a rare few who possess such insight, and choose to never reveal what they know.”

So, there’s some people who can figure out other’s deepest needs and then choose to do nothing with that information?

“Yes Thomas, there are some like that. Old souls, quite evolved in their own journeys typically. They listen and observe carefully without judgment, in doing so they can learn much about someone in a very short time. They notice how other’s comport themselves, and the manners in which they deal with others around them. Yet, even with that knowledge, they simply choose to better themselves and not use it against those they have observed.”

That does sound pretty evolved actually, I’m not sure I know anyone like that myself. I guess if I did, I wouldn’t know it anyway from how you tell it.

Conversations with Omen

“So, you felt the need, on your own to moderate your time spent playing those games?”

Yeah, I was spending hours and hours playing them, neglecting a lot of other things I should have been doing. Even some of my relationships suffered because of it. I found myself choosing to stay home, and not accepting invitations to go out with people. I’d even feign mild ailments to make my staying home seem more plausible.

“It is very admirable that you recognized the addiction and did something about it. Have you thought about what the attraction, or pay-off was? What it was that you were ‘getting’ out of the gaming that was more satisfying than being with your long-time friends?”

Well, yeah, I guess so. I think I liked being in control of some entire situation, even if it was a fictional world. I liked getting so skilled at it that I was becoming admired by others who also played. I mean, there was also some comradery to it, I played with lots of other folks from all over the world. That was the social part of it, and probably made it easier for me to not see my friends much.

“You don’t see another possible component of the addiction?”

I was having a lot of fun too; I suppose enjoyment is a motivator of some kind.

“Think about accomplishment. Does that factor in to it in any way for you?”

I suppose so, I was conquering armies and monsters, stealing treasure and making the world a better place. That was usually kind of awesome!

“Perhaps, but, what was really being accomplished? Were actual monsters slain? Were actual treasures added to your bank account? Is the world truly a better place now?”

Well, it’s a game Omen, it’s not real life. Its fictional fun, it used to relax me and relieve the stress of my day in a creative kind of way.

“I did not mean to insult you, my friend. I just offer a different perspective to you, one that you may consider and accept or reject as you see fit. What I am speaking of is false-accomplishment – the feeling that you have truly done something admirable and satisfying, but yet you have not. The monsters are cartoons, as are the treasures and the lands to be conquered. When your evening is done, you might feel as if you have done the work of goodness, but it truly was all a fiction. The human brain will produce the same satisfying neuro-chemicals that make you feel bliss, but it is not over anything tangible.”

The feelings are real, and the interactions with other people are real too!

“Yes, I do not disagree with either thing you have pointed out. But, those are not usually what you felt pride over, are they? I do not recall you telling me that you had especially satisfying interactions with other players. The stories you told were of your finishing a long and complicated quest of some kind. You spoke of receiving rare rewards for your character, such as weapons or special powers. None of which are real. You cannot remove that sword from the game and wield it in your true-life can you?”

No, of course not. I never claimed that I couldn’t distinguish the game from real-life. I was perfectly aware that none of the rewards were actual objects, and the gold I earned was also fictional. But, it still felt good to get those things… I think I am starting to see what you’re saying now. I can know that the rewards or accomplishments are fictions, but I still felt good about them. Like I was mixing fiction with factual life. Feeling like I’d done something heroic and special, but I’d really just played a game well.

“Yes, the fictional accomplishments caused very real internal reactions – both physical and emotional as well. That kind of easy emotional gratification can become addicting rather quickly – becoming a substitute for actual accomplishment or interactions. I will go further and say that like many other addictions, it ultimately leaves you feeling empty and longing for more of the same feeling.”

So, the gaming becomes a pacifier for the mind? Like alcohol or drugs do? But, I have never heard of gaming ruining someone’s life like drug addictions usually do.

“More than a pacifier, so much more than that; it becomes a false sense of your own self. I agree that there is little academic evidence dealing with gaming causing the downfall of people’s lives, but it remains true that it can happen. Relationships begin to wither and fail, sometimes a person’s physical condition will also begin to wither way. Dietary habits may suffer, along with hygiene and sanitary concerns.”

“Real relationships are often unpredictable and difficult. We do not exercise the same level of control over the obstacles in our true-lives as you felt while in your game world. Many times one is completely out of control of the circumstances in their life for a period, and that is an uncomfortable condition. Getting through a period like that in a positive way is a true accomplishment. Genuinely satisfying accomplishments are fewer and further between for most people living true-lives. Many times they are much more subtle too. But, they are real – and the real feelings tend to last much much longer than the false ones do.”

I can see that, and at some level I must have felt it all along. Even if I couldn’t have put it into words, something in me was nagging at my thoughts the entire time I was so into the gaming. Something was trying to tell me to either stop, or cut way back on it. Somehow I knew I needed to be back with real people, doing actual social things with them. I think I was starting to feel isolated and lonely too – even though I was interacting with other people in the game, it was pretty two dimensional.

“Indeed, false accomplishments and vague relationships cannot lead to genuine feelings of self-love and satisfaction. Only through actual relationships can we truly see ourselves and grow into better souls. In games we can accept challenges, go on conquests or attempt to slay monsters – if we do not best the challenge we have the option of restarting it again. True life is not like that for most people, we often only have one chance to accomplish a goal, and if we fall short of it, we have real consequences to accept.”

Sure, real feelings get hurt, either our own or someone else’s. I get that, but I also know that games are fun, and people will always like them. Heck, I still like them too, I just play a lot less than before. I know that not everyone gets addicted to them either, so what is it that makes the difference?

“A variety of reasons cause different individuals to react in their own ways to the exact same stimulus, or game, in this case. There are those that are very grounded in the present, and remain keenly aware of both what the game provides, and what their true life provides. Others may benefit from the diversion of the game, yet not be seeking a complete escape from their true lives. And, of course, we should not forget those who do not feel the draw of games such as those we are speaking of. Those individuals who lead lives of intimacy, emotion and personal interactions with others. They find all the treasures they ever need in the relationships they have with their fellow human beings.”