Conversations with Omen XIII

“I am afraid that we were sidetracked from your original question, but I assure you that I have not forgotten it. I am somewhat unsure of the scope of your question though, whether you mean the creation story of your species, or were you speaking of the entire universe?”

Can we do both? I was originally thinking about just the earth and humans, but since you mentioned it, the creation of the universe has always interested me as well. Can we start with that first, since that seems to be how things went anyways?

“Certainly Thomas. Once again I must caution you that I do not possess the entirety of knowledge of the events you wish to know about, but I think I do know enough to at least satisfy some of your curiosity.”

Great, let’s start with the Big Bang theory and how all of that got started.

“That is a most evocative title for a theory of the beginning of the current universe, yet I must dispel the notion of a massive explosion being at the heart of that creation.”

What? You’re saying that tens of thousands of physicists are wrong about how things got started here?

“I am not attacking your physics in some broader sense Thomas, just the theory of how the current universe came to be. The vast majority of human physics is well-researched good science, and has been reviewed and confirmed many times over. Yet, there are a small number of the most far reaching theories that are at least partially incorrect. I say that not to disparage any of the brilliant scientists who do such work, but to enlighten you, Thomas, to the notion that not all is what it seems. Effects do not always trace directly back to the absolute cause.”

So, they could be close to the truth, but just off a little? I can buy that, it’s largely how science works anyway, so I’ve got no argument with it. That being said, what’s the real story?

“All of the materials that you know as this universe were always here, that much I am positive about. When and how the Pure Love organized it into the current configuration, I do not have as much information about. Yet, I do believe that the term ‘organized’ is the best word for what was done. Making the purposeful from the idol, organizing the chaos in to something wonderful and useful, all of which was, or still is, part of a plan that I only have partial knowledge of.”

Okay, I get it, all of the building blocks were here already, the Pure Love just used them to make what we know as the universe from all of that. That’s not too hard to understand, but it also seems like you’re saying that this was just an enormous empty space before it was made useful.

“I am always amazed at how the earthbound are obsessed by beginnings and endings. As I mentioned earlier, there are many other possibilities, including that idea that some things have always been. When the purpose of something changes, often it is immediately seen as something different than it was. Yet, it is the same materials, the same foundations that existed always – just reorganized and used differently.”

Like taking sand and making it into glass, right?

“That analogy will suffice.”

Okay, but what was the ‘sand’ in your story?

“You have heard of what your scientists refer to as Dark Matter, and Dark Energy? They are the ‘sand’ in this analogy, the very building blocks of all that you know.”

Yeah, I’ve read about those, but I thought they were really just more speculation than actual theory.

“As I said, much of your physics are absolutely accurate.”

Wow, that’s pretty cool actually; I wish I could tell somebody that they’re right.

“Scientists will actually prove that in the very near future. I am not at all sure that your confirmation would assist them in their efforts.”

I was kidding Omen, I wasn’t really serious. Let’s get back to the creation story though, about something that’s more near and dear to me; the earth and human life?

“You may recall that I have already told you that there is much life in the universe that you are in now. Much of that life has existed for a greater period of time than life on earth has, but each are just as important as the others. A concept to keep in mind is that all life, no matter where it is, all exist for the benefit of soul growth. Each and every world that supports life was made to foster the soul journey that every soul is on.”

Then the earth is just another place, among many, that we live lives on? How many other worlds are there that have life on them?

“Yes to your first question, the earth is one among many places that souls live their lives on. As to your next question, I do not have an accurate answer for you. If you would be satisfied with a very general answer, I can tell you that it is in the thousands – or tens of thousands. Though, there is a strong chance that I am aware only of a portion of a much larger number.”

That’s amazing, am I the only one on earth that knows about this?

“It is likely that you are, but I cannot account for what other souls know, or at least believe in during their lives. Remember Thomas that you are the only one who has found your way past the veil of the afterlife. The mere fact that you and I converse as we do is an unprecedented event in human history. Furthermore, add to this that we have been allowed to continue on in this manner – well, that too is unprecedented.”

I hope you’re not telling me that because I am somehow abusing our relationship with all of my questions. I just figured that since I can talk to you as often as I do, I might as well see if I can get some answers to questions that cross my mind all the time. I don’t want to put you in an awkward position though, or get you in trouble. I just believe that if I asked you something I shouldn’t know about you’d tell me right away.

“Yes, of course I would tell you if there were any boundaries that were crossed, or about to be. Please though, do not be concerned with either of us ‘getting in trouble’ as you said. There is no trouble to be gotten in to, Thomas. I am always mindful of the information I give to you as I would never wish to compromise the natural progression of your soul journey.”

Well, I guess in a way I’ve done that myself already. Back when I first saw you, Seth and Kirk, I think I changed the natural progression of my journey.

“That is not necessarily true Thomas, as that event in itself may truly be your soul’s natural progression. Just because something is unusual, or has not been done before, does not make it unnatural.”

Hey, I might be the first person in a new evolution of people who will be able to contact their soul guides when they want to! I never thought of it like that before.

Conversations with Omen XII

Alright, I’ve avoided this long enough, I guess I didn’t want to seem completely stupid in front of you. It’s just that I remember when I was kid and I was in a religious training school, I was always getting in trouble for asking questions that annoyed the teachers. I really had important questions though, and if I was going to believe what they were saying, I just needed a couple of answers. They thought I was being purposely silly, or obtuse, just to get a rise out of the rest of the kids.

“Were you?”

Was I what? Oh, trying to make the other kids crack up – yeah, I can admit that I was sometimes, but that wasn’t until it was made clear to me that my questions were not appreciated. In the very beginning though, I was completely serious. They’d tell some bible story that was amazing to me, but I always had a few questions about them. I was too young to realize that not all stories came with background information.

“Hmm, sounded a bit suspicious to you I imagine. Did they give you a reason for not answering your important questions?”

Not exactly, but I do remember one guy who tried to. He was the one who headed up the program; in a regular school he’d have been the Principal. Anyway, I was sent to see him after a particularly annoying question that got the whole class in an uproar. I’m pretty sure that he’d been front-loaded about who I was, or who they thought I was. He was super patronizing to me, and basically just said that I needed to have more faith in the biblical stories. I guessed that ‘more faith’ meant less curiosity in my case.

“That is a terrible way to treat a young and thirsty mind Thomas, did you ever find the answers you sought?”

Nope, I just had to swallow back the things I wanted to know more about, at least until I was at an age where I decided it was mostly bullshit.

“You have certainly piqued my curiosity now. Can you remember one of the questions you were so eager to know the answer to?”

Sure, but I don’t think they really have answers to them. If a story is made up, or more like a legend that was loosely based on a real event, I don’t think there’s supporting evidence for it.

“Perhaps you might just humor me and let me hear one?”

Alright, but don’t laugh at this okay? After hearing the story about Noah’s Ark, I was having a really tough time understanding why everything had to be wiped out in order to cleanse the world of it’s sinning. I mean, people did the sinning right? Not the land animals, or fish, or even the birds. And even if it were just kept to the people, I just couldn’t see how the people on the other side of the world – people who’d never even heard of the bible, or God, why they had to drown too. I quickly figured out that I was the only person in that little classroom who saw that story as something bizarre and horrific.

All of the other kids thought it was just fine for billions of animals and innocent people to get flooded out because the Old Testament God was all pissed off at his creations. In fact, that was one of the times I remember the other kids weren’t laughing along with me, they were laughing at me for being such a dork.

“Ahh, the human phenomenon of group-think in action. Thomas, I can assure you that there were many more kids in that class who would have loved to hear a real answer to your question – as they were feeling very much the same as you were. They saw the first kids laugh at you, and did the same so they would not get laughed at as well. Yet, that does not mean that they were not just as curious as you were.”

“Furthermore, I agree that a story such as the one of Noah’s Ark can not really be supported with factual evidences that might answer your skeptical questions. I find it saddening that they would not have thought to suggest that is was more of a parable. That might have satisfied your curiosity and removed some of the horror of the story.”

Yeah, that at least would have given me something to think about for a while.

“I have a feeling that this was not the entirety of what you came to ask me about though. Please allow yourself now to ask what it is that has been on your mind for so very long.”

Well… wow, this is still hard, even now. Um, okay, when I was told the Creation story – in the Christian theology anyway, it started with ‘In the beginning… and God making light, then the heavens and earth. Well, even as a kid, my mind went instantly to the question ‘what was God doing just before he made light?’ Was he just coasting along in the darkness of some great black void that would soon become the universe? Why in the world would he have done that? Well, like I said a minute ago, I don’t really believe that story anyway, but I do still wonder about the beginning of things. I can safely figure out that just about every religion’s ‘God, or Gods’ are really constructions of the Pure Love – so my question then transfers to it. What is the real creation story? What was the Pure Love doing before he made all of us?

“Before I begin to answer the questions put before me, allow me to preface a bit. First I must let you know that I do not know the entire answer to all of what you are asking me, but I do have some of it. I will answer you as completely as I can, but please keep in mind that I am not the Pure Love, who would know more. Second, and a more difficult notion, your use of the term ‘beginning’ is going to cause us some issues.”

Issues? Why’s that? I never thought of it as a tough concept before; things begin and things end.

“Thomas, you are thinking in linear time, the only way that time usually makes sense to the earthbound. Linear time, or a timeline if you prefer, presumes that one event precedes another, then another, and so on. Time always marches forward by your understandings, and that is a natural understanding having the type of lives you live. All humans are born, they age and they eventually die – beginnings and endings, very tidy. Yet, that is not how things are everywhere Thomas, and it would take a tremendous amount of time to explain why that is.”

You mean, like where you’re at, beyond our life here, time isn’t a constant?

“Time exists in a somewhat different way here Thomas. Your time is based on the observable universe that you live in, that many other life forms live in as well. Planetary movements around stars, galaxies moving in the universal space, and even the biological progressions are evidence of time as you know it. It might take a bit of imagination, but consider the idea that not everything has beginnings and endings as you know them, and that in some places time is not a straight line moving in one single direction.”

You’re right about it taking some imagination, it almost makes my brain hurt to try to think of time that way. But, even if time isn’t linear to you, there’s still a ‘present’ isn’t there? Such as ‘right now’ – us having this talk is the present, right?

“There is now, the place the consciousness is focused upon. If you can picture time being like a vinyl record, such as one in your collection; the present is the needle that sits in the groove of the recording. You can choose to set the needle down in any part of the recording and you will instantly hear what is in that spot. The ‘now’ becomes wherever the needle is at the moment of contact with the vinyl record, yet all of the other passages remain as well. It is not a perfect analogy, but perhaps it begins to illustrate the concept for you.”

So you can skip around through time? Just go visit any time that you want to and then head back to the present?

“In a manner of speaking, yes; and as a non-earthbound soul, you are free to do the same. Though it may be an interesting method to review one of your own past lives, most souls do not do this as often as you might be thinking they do.”

Have I done that?

“You and I have indeed reviewed one of your past earthbound lives. What is unexpected by many souls who have done so is the emotional upheaval that is often caused by this type of review.”

Wait, so you all have emotions there, just like we do here?

“Yes Thomas, but it may be more fairly said that humans have a similar emotional capacity to those of us in the afterlife – not the other way around. But, to answer you more fully, we are filled with emotions from the Pure Love. You still may retain a sense of that from your near-death experiences as an infant. A feeling of love and acceptance surrounds each time you come back to this place.”

You feel emotional all the time there? What’s that like?

“Can you recall witnessing a scene, either in person or a recorded event that overwhelmed you with positive emotions? I know that your entertainments are replete with such scenes, although you do have to be open to the experience. But, when you have seen and experienced such a scene, one is filled with an upheaval of loving emotions, and most often tears are brought up as well. That is somewhat akin to what a soul feels here, and yes, all of the time.”

Wow, that’s crazy, how can you stand feeling like that all of the time?

“Are you saying that the times you had experienced emotions such as those, that you did not like it?”

No, I don’t mean it like that, but it’s a lot to handle. Sometimes it’s embarrassing too, if other people see you all teary-eyed and sniffling. Like you said, it’s overwhelming; and it’s kind of uncomfortable when it happens.

“What you are describing is discomfort then, not dislike. Insecurity in displaying your true emotions in the presence of others is a common human trait. Generally the older one gets, the more life experience one has, the easier it becomes to allow others to see the true you. When one gets to such a place they feel those emotions even more deeply, because they are not distracted from them by self-consciousness. As a soul in the afterlife, there is no self-consciousness to contend with and we are free to feel the depth and width of our emotions.”

That sounds pretty great, a little scary, but great. I also know you’re right about the age thing, I was way more self-conscious when I was younger. I feel like I grew into my emotional side when I got to be around forty years old. Now days a sad commercial on the TV can make me tear up. It’s sort of silly, but I still think it’s a good emotional place to be.

Conversations with Omen XI

We’ve spoken recently about the number of lives on earth some souls live through, and I’d like to ask a couple of questions about that, if you don’t mind.

“Ask what you wish to, Thomas.”

Well, I’m sure you know that there’s a huge number of people here who believe in reincarnation, I think at least one major religion teaches that it’s a fact. I was just thinking about how the followers of reincarnation also usually believe in karma too. If someone does something bad to someone else, sooner or later something bad happens to them too. Well, at least it’s something like that, I’m certainly no expert, but that’s the gist anyway. I think some also believe that if you live an evil life this time you’ll live a miserable one the next go-around. What I was wondering was, is any of that even remotely true?

“Just as you realize that your explanation is a generalization of the beliefs of a spiritual group, my answer to your question may also seem general and non-specific. The general notion of reincarnation is clearly based upon a soul’s life-journeys on earth, and it is generally true. But, the absoluteness in your description of karma is most definitely not how things work in a soul’s journey of growth. One might think from the way you described it that karma is just a delayed ‘eye for an eye’ concept of justice. This is not at all what the teachings of many religions and philosophies are saying. Like many spiritual and religious ideas, the meaning of karma has been modified over time – often manipulated to serve the purposes of those doing the teaching.”

So the people in power will change the meaning of it to make people behave in a certain way?

“Yes, that is one of the ways it happens, but sometimes the meanings are just altered slightly to fit the belief systems of the group, or person, doing the teachings. If you can allow yourself to imagine far enough back in your history, to a time when teachings were in the oral tradition, you can understand how meanings shifted from teacher to teacher. Yet, even when religious tenants and philosophies were written, they were still subject to reinterpretation by those who did the transcribing, or those who paid to have it done.”

Okay, I get that part, but how does, or did, karma really work?

“Again, I am not so much describing karma as an actuality, but trying to elucidate for you how the concept came to be. Even in its original definition, karma does somewhat dovetail into your understandings of justice and fairness. Humans, as far back in your history as you may go, have always had a notion of fairness. Therefore, they also understood unfairness as well, as they cannot really be parted from each other. People would naturally observe incidents of unfairness and feel that what they were witnessing did not feel ‘right’. This would lead to the idea that fairness was a more desirable way to have things.”

“Karma became an accepted idea many centuries ago, when people first were creating stories explaining why things were they way they were. With the concept of fairness in mind, karma became a favored concept amongst people who were treated unfairly. It became an idea that brought hope to many people who were not of a privileged stature or class. Those people would imagine that the very ones mistreating them would themselves one day pay a comeuppance for their evil deeds. Add to that the idea that if one practiced good deeds towards others, they would be rewarded at some future time. These concepts brought great hope to those who might have otherwise had very little of it, but they do not reflect or describe how the soul journey actually works.”

So, the Pure Love isn’t keeping score and doing its best to make everything fair?

“No Thomas, the Pure Love may know how one’s soul journey is progressing, but does not interfere with the earthbound. I think you will remember our discussion about what you judge as right and wrong, and how that does not apply on this side. There are myriad reasons as to why a human would be unfair, mean or even cruel to others – and even more complexities as to how that fits into so many other soul journeys. Remember that one human’s cruelty may exist to teach ten thousand others to rise up against such behavior and endeavor to diminish it in the future.”

Sometimes there seems like there’s a high price to pay for such a lesson. Hitler was one seriously evil man and millions of people died before he was finally overthrown. That would be unbelievably screwed-up if it was just to teach everyone a world-lesson on the ills of dictatorships.

“I would not, and could not, tell you that there was only one simple lesson in such a horrific world event as that Thomas. Your ability to condense an unfathomably complex event into a two dimensional occurrence is startling I must say. You cannot reduce historical world events down to such a simple question. The deeds that humans do, both terrible and good, are not scripted events as in a play or movie. I know I have told you that there are some major life events that a soul may be aware of before they become earthbound, but that is in no way indicating that all living beings are just going through an elaborate script. Every single life is has control of their destiny and is free to choose their path.”

So, then in some other scenario Hitler could have been hit by a car back when he was young, and the world would have been saved from all his crazy murdering?

“Certainly, or he could have chosen to take his own life, had he been suffering from depression or some other malady. But, this sort of reimagining of the past is pointless other than to illustrate the truth of complete free-will amongst you. A better use of the imagination is to picture the endless possibilities of one’s future.”

I’ve got to admit that I’ve never believed in predestination, even though a lot pf people talk about it like it’s a given. Preachers espousing ‘God’s will’ for this or that, it’s always seemed more like they’re just telling people what they want, but using God’s name. But, according to you the Pure Love doesn’t magically communicate his wishes to the earthbound souls.

“That is true Thomas, the concept of ‘God’s will’ is a unique human construct. If there were any communications of what the Pure Love did, or did not want from people, more likely it would be a guide such as myself that would be the one to deliver a message. Again, that is just fodder for the imagination, as I have told you that the Pure Love does not interfere here. I do wish to reassure you of one thing Thomas, most souls follow their life paths that they agreed upon before becoming earthbound. It is usually only under very extreme and unpredictable circumstances that an earthbound soul diverts from the path that was chosen.”

So, no ‘rogue’ souls huh?

“In all of my time as a guide I have witnessed very few willfully misguided souls. The few I can think of mostly chose paths that were better for them overall. Although they diverted from what they had set out to do originally, they ended up living lives that were richer and fuller than they had set out to. When their earthbound time ended, they and their guides were usually both quite pleased.”

Conversations with Omen X

>> You know, Omen, this whole process reminds me of college, taking classes and exams in order to receive a degree. I’m not trying to diminish the soul journey, but it sure is a coincidence that they seem so much the same.

>>“There are many human social constructs that mimic the processes on this side, Thomas. It is not coincidence so much as it is souls, in human lives, creating social structures that feel familiar to them on some level. Many souls, especially ones who have had many earthbound lives, retain vague impressions from this side. Their experience and wisdom shines through even in human form.”

But, how can anyone possibly remember things from the other side? Other than those markers you told me about, it seems like we’re wiped pretty clean at birth.

“Allow me to use a metaphor; picture the mind as seashore, where ocean meets land. The ocean is our life actions, the beachfront is the mind. Memories are made in the vast expanse of sand; perhaps you can picture them as sand-castles. Some stay the test of time, others fall apart over the years of your life and are gone. Now, imagine that when some are born, making the transition from pure energy to earthbound life form, there are grains of that sand that retain some understanding of their soul life. Those grains do not a memory make, but they still have some imagery or feeling to them. As the mind scans that shore for memories and information it occasionally passes over one of those grains and feels something – imagines something that although incomplete still seems familiar.”

So, in our current computer terms, it’s like a bit of memory. Not really enough to make up a command, but still holds on to something?

“Yes, that is a sufficient analogy for this discussion. That small grain that was retained at the time of birth is enough to have what you call a notion, enough to trigger an idea sometimes. Your observation of how soul-growth resembles your college programs is understandable given this information. Education, examination and reaching goals are akin to what a soul’s path is here. If you recall your history, the original colleges were assemblies of persons who desired to learn.”

Like a soul and its guide, right? Together you examine the life they just returned from and make a plan for their next one.

“Exactly, and a soul who may have been through that process many times is more likely to retain more grains of the experience with each new life.”

I imagine that back when people were getting together to create social institutions like colleges, or even governments, that some already had a notion of what would work the best.

“Yes, it is quite likely that in any sizeable group of people there would be some who retain some grains of memory from this side, and have that influence their ideas. Although, your history has many examples of societies that did not seem to have been influenced by anything a soul had retained from here. Dictatorships and Juntas do not appear to be modeled after anything that I have ever experienced.”

True, I can see that, but what about monarchies?

“There is a good chance that social structures of that type were misguidedly based on memories of the Pure Love. The feeling that there is something greater than ourselves is a common one in the earthbound souls. It is very obvious that the bulk of religions are made from that exact notion, but not many realize that monarchies come from the same feelings. The difference being that the latter group elevates another earthbound soul as the one deserving worship and reverence.”

Are there really no humans that are better than the rest of us? I’m not really talking about Kings and other royalty, but just anyone. You’ve mentioned ‘old souls’ before, aren’t they kind of better than the rest of us in some way?

“No Thomas, not in the way you are presenting it at least. There are millions of humans who deserve recognition for the acts that they have done, or the way they have chosen to live their lives. That does not make them better than other humans, but it is their choices and behavior that distinguish them. Most will not receive any kind of recognition or appreciation, but they continue to live in ways that are fine examples to all others. They know something important that many others do not; helping your fellow human beings is the single most satisfying occupation one can spend their life doing.”

A ‘life of service’ is what we call it here, and I’ve read stories about people who have dedicated their lives to doing good things for people. I guess I’ve never thought about how may more there might be who just quietly go about helping others. Not that they seek that out or anything, I really do believe that it just makes you feel good about yourself no matter what. I’ve done some volunteer work in my past, and I keep meaning to do it again… I just keep putting it off. I suppose I haven’t decided what it is I want to do. I hope I’m not just kidding myself.

“You mean internally imagining that you will serve others again at some point in time, but not actually making it true?”

Yeah, I’m good at that sometimes. I have the best intentions, but I don’t follow through with what I think I am going to do. I don’t get that either, I mean if we’re good souls with all of the inspiration of the Pure Love in us, how do we get so astray from our higher intentions?

“The human mind is a fusion of physical properties and the soul that brings life to it. It is vastly complicated the way the mind and soul interact together, in some ways even I do not yet fully understand all of it. When the soul enters the human body, at your birth, it is much like the engine of an automobile starting. The body being the physical engine, and the soul being the spark that ignites it into life. Yet, the outcome is fantastically unpredictable because of myriad factors. As the soul settles into the body, the mind is created and becomes a living and growing being. Beyond the physical factors are also your life experiences, your interactions with those that are formative in your life, and your developed internal dialog.”

My internal dialog? How does that make me who I am, or affect my life’s outcome? It’s just me thinking about stuff in my own head.

“Thomas, your internal dialog is the personification of your soul/body fusion. It is what you know as your personality, as it is with everyone else you know. Your own internal voice is what you reason with, it is what you measure and decide with, and it is what you base your idea of normal upon. Certainly you have encountered persons in your life who are decidedly different than not only yourself, but anyone you have ever met before. They behave differently, they speak differently and they definitely think differently than you do. If you could eavesdrop on their internal dialog you would only hear a completely unintelligible foreign language. Each being has an internal dialog that is completely different than every other, much like a fingerprint.”

I had no idea Omen, I suppose I just thought that everyone hears their own thoughts in their own voice, kind of like I do. I hadn’t even thought if it as a dialog before you put it that way, but I agree with you now, it really is like an ongoing conversation with myself.

“It is that very conversation that is essentially the person that you see yourself as Thomas. That dialog is what you think with, and make decisions with – it is what you measure the rest of the world with as well. A person such as yourself, rational, intelligent and kind, will interact with others in the way you have been taught – and you feel is right. But, others who do not share your way of thinking or behaving are not defective somehow; they just have a vastly different internal conversation. In fact, in rare cases some are in a form of mental pain that you may not even be aware is possible. Their internal dialog is like two grinding stones, constantly and abrasively turning every experience into a painful dust as they methodically reexamine every interaction they ever have.”

Wow, that sounds awful, isn’t there some way to help those people? It sounds like a pretty bad way to go through life.

“Thomas, sometimes those very people are the most brilliant in a society – and sometimes they are the ones who go mad. The notion of helping them may be well-intentioned, but typically unnecessary. They are making their way through a life just as you are, and the fact that they think differently than you do is just a footnote. You must remember that everyone thinks differently, even those that you believe think much as you do… they do not think exactly like you do.”

I get that, and I don’t think that I have ever expected that anyone I know thinks just exactly the way I do, but I can admit that I figured people thought in the same manner as I do. I mean that in kind of a mechanical way, as in, they think operationally the same way I do.

“I am afraid that even that much of a generalization still does not hold true. As I said earlier, the fusion of soul and body is quite complex and the mind that develops from that fusion is yet another degree of complexity. Humans do have so much in common with each other, much more than most realize, but their minds are not one of those things. Let me illustrate one last concept to help you understand this better. You believe that you are thinking in your own language, correct?”

Sure, I think in English, and my inner dialog is the same. I’d be pretty sure that everyone in any country around the world thinks in their native language, whatever it is.

“Therefore, by your reasoning, the deaf must not be able to think at all, or enjoy an inner dialog either – yet, clearly they do.”

Well, they probably think in images I guess.

“Then those that are unfortunately both deaf and blind must not be able to think.”

I’m not saying that, I just don’t know how they do it. I really can’t even begin to imagine how they think about things, it must be really different.

“I am not trying to trap you Thomas, I am only showing you that despite lack of both verbal language and sight, humans manage to think, and think well too. This is the complexity I was speaking of, the amazing plasticity and resilience of the human mind. The soul will not be diminished by physical impairments, it will find a way to be known.”

Conversations with Omen IX

You’ve told me a lot about how souls and their guides work out what that soul needs to learn in their next life on earth. It actually makes a lot of sense to me, and I feel like sometimes I can even glimpse what some of my objectives are. But, is there any way I can know whether I’m succeeding or failing in whatever my pre-life plan was? How can I know if I’m fulfilling what I’ve set out to learn in this life right now?

“Is there something in particular that you feel that you are not accomplishing, Thomas?”

Well, it’s just a feeling I get randomly. I realize that I don’t absolutely know what my soul-plan here is, but I do get feelings sometimes that I can’t explain. Feelings like I’m stagnant, or not going in the right direction in my life. I’ll feel like I’m receding instead of proceeding. Yet, at other times I can get a feeling of pure bliss for no reason, like everything in my life is just perfect.

“Almost all earthbound souls do not remember what their life goals are that they agreed upon with their guides. Once born into an earthly body, you must use your own feelings and experience to navigate your life plan. The feelings that you are speaking of may indeed be accurate markers of your progress, or lack of it.”

Markers? I guess I’m not sure how you mean that.

“I apologize, it is a term we all use on this side, a simplification of a complex process. A soul can only know the most significant event points of their coming earthbound life, the bulk of that life is fluid and unknowable. Your soul-group peers are important to your earthbound life, so we set markers in an attempt at recognition. As an example, your life has already crossed paths with several of your peers you have known for a very long time. Souls you feel tremendous love for, and wish to be with in your current life. But, because you otherwise may not recognize them in human form, you set markers to tip your memory. Do you remember meeting your friend Renee? You first saw a photograph of her before you met her. Do you remember having a feeling as you first looked at her photo?”

Yeah, I do, there was something about the way she looked. Her eyes and her unusual hairstyle caught my attention. Not in a ‘romantic attraction’ kind of way, but something intrigued me about her. She even told me that she had the same kind of thoughts after seeing my picture. I just had this feeling that I’d meet her in-person someday and we’d become friends.

“Of course you did, because you had both set a marker to recognize each other. Those souls that we are closest to will often intermingle with our lives – when we truly want to share some part of that life with them, markers are set to trigger some intuition between us. These are quite subtle though, and many are missed completely, written off as just an odd feeling. More experienced souls learn to trust those feelings, and move in the direction that they guide one towards.”

That actually explains a lot for me, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had those feelings around people I randomly run into. But, back to my original question which I don’t think I explained very well; sometimes I get a feeling like I’ve failed someone. Like when I look back at past relationships and the people I was in them with, and I feel like I could have, or should have done a lot better.

“When you say that you feel as if you have failed them, do you mean that you think there was a goal to achieve and you did not do so?”

I don’t know if it’s a goal per se, but when I consider some personal relationships I’ve had – especially ones that ended badly – I feel like I failed at something. It feels like there was something I was supposed to learn with them, and that it didn’t happen.

“I see. Perhaps I can frame this in a different construct for you, to aid in your understanding of your feelings. The goals of a soul’s earthbound life are indeed important, and are often not met until well in to that life. In other words, there may be many attempts in one’s life to achieve a certain goal before they are successful. However, not learning a lesson that is part of a life-goal is not a failure Thomas. Even if you went through an entire life and did not accomplish your decided goal, that life is not seen as a failure. So much more goes on in a human life, myriad interactions with other lives that cannot be judged so easily. The complex weave of the interactions of different lives is akin to a four-dimensional puzzle, and difficult for the human mind to comprehend.”

I get that part, I guess, but the other people who may have been there for me to learn from – and I didn’t – don’t they lose out on something too? I mean, had I learned whatever I was supposed to, wouldn’t they also feel like they accomplished something as well? Maybe they had a similar goal to mine, and we both missed our chance to finish it?

“I think I see where this is coming from now, Thomas. I believe you are starting from a false premise and therefore your conclusions are misguided. The ending of an intimate relationship can be quite an emotional upheaval, and it is not uncommon for one or both parties to fall into a cycle of introspection. A reexamination of difficult interactions, choices and events that may have led to the relationship ending. Blaming yourself, or the other party, can be part of the emotional recovery one goes through. However, given enough time, one may eventually gain a more balanced perspective when reconsidering the relationship.”

“Whether a relationship lasts for days, or decades, there are usually many lessons learned about oneself. Sometimes it is the very thick emotional compounds created by the individuals in the relationship that make it difficult to see those lessons until quite some time later. You are a soul of uniquely deep emotions Thomas, and I have seen you go through long periods of deep introspection after a relationship had ended for you. You spend quite a bit of time attempting to find the exact cause of the relationship’s demise, yet I have never heard you conclude that you were simply not compatible.”

You mean like a no-fault auto accident? It wasn’t me, it wasn’t her, it was just that we weren’t compatible? To answer you, I would have to say no, I’ve never come to that particular conclusion before. I guess I have always thought that two people who are attracted to each other, and who get along well, should be able to have a long term relationship. I know it’s not automatic, and it takes a lot of work, but it still seems like it should work out if both parties are willing to keep trying.

“I know you really do feel that way, but perhaps you are missing something very important. Human beings are fantastically complex Thomas, each with a unique mind and life experience. The fact that two of those beings can occasionally come together and actually have a successful long term relationship is an amazing accomplishment. More often than not, they are two souls who have had other lifetimes together where they were also close in some relationship. Occasionally, though, there are some who come together by random circumstance and have a genuine relationship blossom from it. That being said, you must realize that there are innumerable relationships that do not work out in the manner you think of as a success – many times more often than the ones that work out well.”

So, you’re saying that even if I were a completely grounded and emotionally balanced individual, that I could still have failed relationships?

“Oh Thomas, yes, of course that is true because it is not entirely up to you. Simply look at the number of psychological professionals who have lived through the ending of their own romantic relationships. As wise as they may be, and as much as they may know about themselves and others, they still have relationships that do not work out – even when the relationship might be between two of those counseling professionals. One might think that two smart and experienced emotional counselors could forge a wonderful romance, but statistically their divorce rate is somewhat higher than non-professionals. It simply is not about what you know or how hard you try, people are far too complex for that to be so.”

“Thomas, if, when you look back at your previous relationships, you find you have mistreated someone – just by recognizing that, you have learned and grown. Yes, you may have the opportunity, on occasion, to make amends to someone, but that is somewhat rare. Most of the time you do not have such a chance, but seeing your part and acknowledging it – that is growth in itself. You did not fail that person, nor yourself, when your relationship ended. Every relationship you have in your life, romantic or platonic, are all vehicles of emotional growth.”

I’ve made some bad decisions, and I even betrayed a partner once, but I’ve never been the abusive type. I’ve said things that I wish I could take back, and I have done some things out of anger too. In the case where I was unfaithful, I was pretty young and prone to bad decision making back then. I think my self-worth was based on who was attracted to me, and who I could get into bed. That particular relationship ended so badly that I didn’t have a chance to apologize to her, and I still feel a lot of guilt about it some thirty years later.

“Guilt is a form of self-punishment Thomas, based upon your inner judgments of your own behavior. It is much like remorse, which is also based on your behavior, but less in judgment. Remorse is based more in reflecting on your interactions with others and seeing how you could have done things differently. Remorse has a component of wanting to be better, and seeing how you can actually do so. You cannot truly know how any given relationship fits into the fabric of what you need to learn. After all, recovering from heartbreak in a healthy way is a very valuable lesson for one to master, as is self-forgiveness.”

Well, guilt, or remorse aside; will I have to answer to her in the afterlife once we’re both passed on?

“Again, Thomas, you are thinking in simple dualities. Right and wrong, good or bad, rewards or punishments. As we have spoken of before, those do not exist on this side. You do not answer to any other soul for the things you have done in an earthbound life. You examine your own life, learn from it, and move on from there. Each time, each life, learning greater and deeper lessons which will bring you closer to the Pure Love.”

You know, Omen, this whole process reminds me of college, taking classes and exams in order to receive a degree. I’m not trying to diminish the soul journey, but it sure is a coincidence that they seem so much the same.

“There are many human social constructs that mimic the processes on this side, Thomas. It is not coincidence so much as it is souls, in human lives, creating social structures that feel familiar to them on some level. Many souls, especially ones who have had many earthbound lives, retain vague impressions from this side. Their experience and wisdom shines through even in their human form.”